prescription for poison

10:03 pm: Another brief resurrection
Otwell got into a wonderful school and is very excited and happy. i'm sure she's going to make a post about it so i'm not going to disclose which school it is but it starts with an A and ends with an ntioch.

Current temp in Fairbanks is 1 and there's light snow.

But more importantly Otwell got into a prestigious school in Ohio...

10:31 pm: To all my faithful livejournal readers:

Yes, I have been dead for awhile. Nothing short of that would have kept me from my beloved livejournal for so long. In that time I gained employment, a house (though briefly), and kittens. Sadly, the house is gone but the job and, unfortunately, the kittens remain. The kittens are known by many names: Belle & Sebastian, Bowie & Frankie, Ann Coulter & the Lesser of Two Evils, or whatever profanities I happen to shout out when they dig their cute little claws into my skin.

Residence continues to be a problem for me. I've decided not to sign a lease for the apartment by Morgan. The options that sound the best currently are pulling an Otwell's mom and finding a rich man who is in the process of being divorced to impregnate me or just going all out and moving into my car. Needless to say, I'm open to suggestions.

And I finally know where I will be in two years. Fairbanks, Alaska. Current Temperature: -13 (and that's without wind chill, bitches). The University of Alaska at Fairbanks also has a regional college at Nome that I was interested in but my parents reacted by laughing for several minutes straight and I decided that it probably wasn't a good idea to bring up financing for the Nome campus. So Fairbanks it is. If I make it through college with all my fingers and toes, I will feel more accomplished for that than any degree I receive.

Ok, this resurrection has been amazing but I can't guarantee that it's a permanent condition.

02:34 pm: my dad's 51st birthday was yesterday. his cake had elmo on it...

12:38 am: and when i fall down, i'll fall apart. trade in my bike for a shopping cart.
it seems like everyone hates me. i can't wait til i get my own apartment so i can sit alone and cry.

you all suck! everyone! hate! jesus!

03:26 pm: i feel like chris... i can definately trace most of the bad things in my life to one event. no i cant remember the exact month, day, or hour but it's pretty much the same. if i hadnt screwed up yeah my life would be a lot easier and i'd probably be happier in general but i don't think i'd have nearly enough fun or do as much. however at times like this i don't know if i would mind. i think i need to stop contradicting myself. i want to find a cave to live in for awhile with lots of books and alcohol. or maybe i'd just like a night of reading and drinking. drinking would've made this weekend a lot better.

i hate not being able to decide what i really want.

12:32 am: without that dream i never would have you
i've been in a really huge miles davis mood. well a jazz mood in general but i would prefer miles davis. i hate having to search through my computer to find music because it's all under different users and makes me have to disconnect the internet. oh well i really want to listen to miles davis right now.

12:22 am: almost didn't go to the show tonight but did and had fun...

enjoyed the car ride back more than the show. we made it home in 2 1/2 hours.

and my kitty is out of the hospital.

12:59 am: today was bad then good then bad...

louis left. it was sad. i cried.

tech conference was more enjoyable than i thought it would be. our music video won ($50 baby.. now we got some scrilla!).
also went to otwell's and played by the lake.

then we went back to my house and we saw a bird fly into a window and we thought it was going to die but it ended up flying away... or my mom just told me that to make me feel better.

and acorn's in the intensive care unit of the animal hospital. i cried again. it made me think of beauty :(

02:23 am: freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose...
i love janis joplin.

drinking out of a big juice thing makes me feel classy...

and sweet boys make me happy and put me in good moods that make me want to ramble.

alright i have things to do

02:36 pm: it feels like i havent seen cameron in ages. i miss him so much. apparently he can write his name now. i remember when we were excited that he could walk and talk... it's crazy that that seems so normal now. i dont want him to grow up anymore though. i want him to stay cute and innocent forever and not have to worry about all the shit that happens as you grow up. i love him more completely than i have ever loved anyone. i guess its a preview of what i'll feel about my own kids, until they're teens at least.

im in a movie watching mood.

04:40 pm: wow... now i kinda feel bad... at least i called allegra... hmm

03:54 pm: in a lot of trouble for a night that was definately not worth it... i cried at some point but i dont remember why... probably something that didn't matter. right now i feel like crying for a kind of good reason. i just feel like crying more in general. it feels good afterwards. i guess i'm emo now but its also good practice for soap opera acting.

i think i'm going to quit smoking. i think that might help put me back on my parents' good side.

i'm going to sit in my dark room and listen to dashboard confessional for awhile. i might write some poetry about the cruel world and my broken heart.

aww the kitty's crying

01:39 am: i said i'd never get a livejournal and when i got a livejournal i said i would never get a myspace and now i have both...

"what does the drunk kitty look like....... that's not drunk"
"maybe it'll start barfing"

02:42 am: it doesn't matter

01:16 am: i had to update just so i could have a mood because the kittens are cute

12:25 am: i've been doing a lot of random acts of kindness lately... i should get a prize. i told lizzie to play a song for morgan to make her happy, made biscuits for homeless people, gave otwell sustenance for d.c., and am working on another with ms. morgan that will play out next week (hopefully). morgan and i are also looking for boyfriends (girlfriends are alright too, but you must provide your own strap-on), so if you'd like to date either of us there's an application in the making.

10:02 pm: oh my god! i'm never leaving my house again! tonight my parents bought a ps2 and DDR!!! right now my sister and morgan are playing. it's amusing...

03:45 pm: the lovely morgan is living with me now and for the last couple days all we have done is clean. but our room looks a lot better than it did so it was worth it. it's still a long way from being done. people and finding things in my room have made me not want to go out for awhile. im no longer excited about the show tonight.

12:34 am: i got bored with livejournal even quicker than diary-x...

12:03 am: we want to be here all day
This day was very bi-polar. Now I'm confused, exhausted, and somewhat sad... but the ups and downs averaged out to be a good day so it's ok I guess... I still want to run away to someplace nice though. Anyone interested in finding a uninhabited desert isle?